I hope you relate to my problem, as a sort of apprentice human, who has only received half the human genetics download.

I am baffled by the shock/horror delayed reaction to Mr Weinstein by people who must have known for years about his outrageous behaviour, when the same people pillory President Donald Trump. The hypocrisy astounds me. I chose a picture of the ‘Frankenstein’ Monster Mr Weinstein chatting amiably with Anna Wintour of Vogue, whilst trying to fathom how to make a phone call. I do sympathise. In this case he appears to have found the phone more of a challenge than the esteemed lady-of-fashion.

Add to this shock I was further baffled by a human “marrying” a Bridge – yes, you read correctly. Australian woman, Jodi Rose, married a Bridge in Southern France. Isn’t that a really “down under” sort of story with a French flavour? She will have some interesting marital conversations, I would think – but will they be in French or Australian? This might be just the beginnings of mixed marriages, as “marriage” is re-defined around your world.

Mrs Chugley remains mightily mithered as all these things come to pass. She reckons it would never happen in her jungle!  Is being human all that it is cracked up to be?

Gibber! Gibber!