As my readers know I thoroughly enjoy the TV programmes The Outsiders, with Rowan Dean and Ross Cameron, aided and encouraged by their very articulate friend, Andrew Bolt who also interviews sundry other men of insight and common sense, such as the recently sacked Mark Latham. You see, as an apparently evolving Chimpanzee, these programmes are helpful to my understanding of the human condition, including such puzzling characters as Stan Grant and Clover Moore.

After watching Andrew Bolt last night I am more convinced than ever that I want to remain a Chimpanzee – no more of this evolving for me! One jumping gene is enough. What concerns me most is that the zoo’s electricity will be cut off and disable my computer, which this handy gene has only just enabled me to master. At this rate the zoo admission charge will have to skyrocket, My admiring public, who  are increasingly impoverished trying to keep their lights on, will have to stay at home. It is a sort of multiple whammy effect.

Even more stupidity is evident. Following on from my last post they are now considering demolishing the Captain Cook Statue in Sydney’s Hyde Park. Warren Mundine observed, most succinctly, that the Pyramids must be in line for the same treatment, because they were built by slaves. Really, how stupid can you lot get? The brave Captain was doing his duty in his day, and very bravely too! How would I feel if they put my statue up when I died, then demolished it because they decided bananas were now endangered?

Added to this you seem to be competing to eliminate government ministers because of citizenship concerns. What sort of monkey business is this? Don’t you know where you came from?

I shall have to seek out my old professor of Gibberish. Maybe he can explain this lunacy. Gibber gibber…